Alright, so…being the best homeschool mom you can be? Avoiding burnout in homeschooling? This is a tricky topic-but a relevant one, and very important!

There are probably thousands of articles out there in the zeitgeist about all the things homeschool moms (and dads) should be doing. Being in charge of your child’s education is a BIG deal, and at times can feel like a heavy burden to carry alone!

This is only year three for me, so I am learning as I go. I was a teacher before I had kids, but in many ways, classroom teaching is very different than homeschooling! So, I don’t have anything monumental to share. It’s not original, or something that many people have not already thought of. But, maybe it will encourage one person!

I often find that being in a community of moms keeps creative ideas flowing, helps us consider things in a new light, and helps guard against discouragement. Sometimes you read the simplest hack of all time, but it changes everything for you! You just never know.

So, with that in mind, I’ve been brainstorming some things that have been consistently helpful for me, these past three years, as I’ve navigated the journey as a beginner homeschool mom. If it is even a tiny bit helpful for you, I will be glad!

Your Favorite Things

A simple question…what are a few of your favorite things? This can be hard for parents to even muster up. We spend our days with our focus on our kids–the ones who need the most from us! Sometimes it causes us to become a bit hazy on what we love to do, what relaxes us, what brings us joy. Here are a few ideas that may help jog your memory. 😉

• Do you love being outdoors? Maybe you miss the fresh mist of the forest, the way the lake waves sound lapping against the dock, or the chatter of backyard birds in the morning.
• Do you love peace and quiet, the stillness indoors? Maybe you’re craving some alone time. The ability feel rested, to be lost in a good book, or write down your thoughts in a pretty floral journal with your favorite pen.
• Do you love to cook or bake? Maybe you’ve got 72 recipes pinned on your Foodie Pinterest board that have never been tested. Maybe there’s a treat you had on a date three years ago you’ve been dying to recreate. (For me, it’s a pistachio-almond-ganache cheesecake I had in NYC. Oh my goodness).
• Do you love to be active? Maybe you’ll book the pickleball courts at your local park, work on your swing at the driving range, or go on an impromptu hike with your husband.
• Do you love to create? Maybe your knitting needles are nestled amongst some peach-colored yarn, gathering dust in your sunroom. Maybe there’s a craft you’ve been wanting to try, but the materials are still waiting for you at Michael’s.
• Do you love music? Maybe you’ve been dying to just sit at the piano, and play without interruptions or tasks bombarding your brain.
• Do you love the absence of agenda? Maybe your best plans are no plans! Maybe you love having a wide open day, where nothing is scheduled and there is no rushing or “shoulds.” Maybe you’d love to hit up a brewery with a few co-op mom friends, once the kids are in bed. Maybe you love reruns of your old favorites (The Office, New Girl, & Breaking Bad, for us!) and lounging around for the day. Maybe you’d love to be fancy and go to a real movie theater to see what’s playing right now!

You get the idea. We all have a wide range of interests! I’m sure you have more than one. I also know that some people gravitate towards hobbies that others find cumbersome! To some extent, I am one of those. I do feel a sense of peace and calm when my home is “in order,” even though that is relative with four kids home every day. I also feel relaxed, energized, and fully myself when I am creating products or writing on this blog! It’s a lot like “work,” but to me, it is edifying. Using your gifts is an intriguing way to be energized-think about it! How do your own giftings give you life?

Rediscovering your interests

This was a topic I discussed at length with my husband, this year. Things get chaotic with four kids, especially when you homeschool them! It’s a very full, enriching-kind-of-chaotic, but chaotic nonetheless. We try to be mindful of ourselves as individuals, as a couple, and as parents! All three are important.

We actually think about this in regards to our kids, too. We were trying to figure out what types of activities to try out, which activities to skip, and which activities are worth pursuing, for each child. One thing we kept coming back to that helped us prioritize, was: What does each of our children do, without prompting or suggestion, when they have free time?

We tried to be extra observant for several weeks, to see what each of our kids would do. It was a good exercise to see how they naturally gravitate, and how we may need to nudge them a bit! (For example, my daughter is highly creative and will never turn down an art class of any kind. She’s also athletic, but she has little interest in organized sports. Because we want her to have skills and knowledge about health & exercise, we can still have her try out different sports, even though it isn’t her top interest.)

Along that same train of thought, think of your own self, as an individual: what do you do (or would you do) if you had some free time? What are your favorite things? Choosing three things (or even one!) can help you create a plan for self-care.

Self-Care: What does it mean?!

I’ll be honest. When I hear the phrase “self-care,” I kind of tune it out. We’ve heard it so much for the past decade, it has ceased to have much meaning!

Additionally, when I hear “self-care,” I automatically think of a spa. I think of special potions for your face, cooling cucumbers, face masks, a bubble bath with rose petals, the whole nine yards. In reality, the spa stereotype is only one tiny example of self-care. Does it still count? Of course! I’m just saying, there are numerous other types of self-care.

Self-care can also look like:

• Saying what you mean, and meaning what you say!
• Creating simple boundaries to protect your peace (this book changed my life, truly)
• Prioritizing 8 hours of sleep each night
• Doing kid-free Saturday mornings so you can reset (if you don’t have family in town to babysit, try a kid-swap with friends!)
• Brain dump, or morning pages, to get thoughts or prayers on paper
• Choosing 1-2 new healthy snack ideas to try this week, to fuel your body properly
• Being accountable & encouraging to a friend, who is in a similar life stage as you
• Finding a mentor. My own mentor, Kim, has helped me immensely in so many ways
• Asking for help. Is this obvious? Yes. Is it always easy to do? No. Don’t make your loved ones read your mind. Ask for help, with kindness, and be specific. Clear requests for what you need are helpful for everyone involved.

Continuing Education for homeschool moms

Continuing Education, Professional Development, credit hours…remember those terms?! It may seem like a distant memory, but for many of us, our jobs fresh out of college involved terms like these. In many professional fields, employees are encouraged and expected to continue their education. Continuing education helps maintain competency, cultivate community, catalyze creativity, and prevent burnout. Think about it…those are all things that are VERY helpful as parents and homeschool educators, too!

Many writers & influencers online have pointed out that parenthood, and homeschool education, are both real jobs. Parents deserve just as much respect as any other “official career–” often times, more so. About two years ago, I started treating my role as a mom and my role as a homeschool educator as a true “job.” It helped my mindset immensely. I try to think about how I would dress, behave, handle conflict, and handle burnout at one of my old jobs, pre-kids. This helps me get a grip, be more disciplined in planning, voice my concerns, and problem-solve in a way that empowers me, rather than cripples me.

I have always been a teacher at heart. I have also been a lover of organization and efficiency. I make lists, upon lists, upon lists! I am a writer, so I keep post-it notes, colored pens and paper…everywhere. (Just ask my husband!) I need to have something to scribble on at a moment’s notice. I love to learn, so that has been an easy thing to pursue. Maybe that isn’t the case for you! If so, that’s ok. I would love to pass along a few humble recommendations, of my favorite podcasts, books, and ideas for what has helped me.

Best Books for Homeschooling Moms

Note: These are not affiliate links. They’re linked to Amazon for the ease of seeing what they look like, and reading reviews. If I could link you to your local library, I would 🙂

The Brave Learner, by Julie Bogart

Raising Critical Thinkers, by Julie Bogart

How To Talk So Little Kids Will Listen, by Adele Faber

How Children Learn, by John Holt

Plan Your Year, by Pam Barnhill

The Whole-Brain Child, by Daniel Siegel

For The Children’s Sake, by Susan Macaulay

The Intentional Family, by William Doherty

Homeschool Hacks, by Lindsey Knerl

Homeschool Bravely, by Jamie Ericson

The Call of the Wild & Free, by Ainsley Arment

Best Podcasts for Homeschooling Moms

I will admit-I am a huge podcast listener, but haven’t found a ton that I really love, for homeschooling! The main one I love is Brave Writer Podcast, with Julie Bogart and Melissa Wiley. Julie Bogart is one of my favorite educators and veteran homeschool moms; you’ll notice I cited two of her books, above. She gives off major “big sister energy” and is an expert in understanding the challenges of homeschool moms, the great responsibility of differentiating instruction for our kids, and the master of presenting learning in a whimsical, memorable and family-culture-building way. She owns a business called Brave Writer, which offers writing programs for kids, but her podcast covers everything. 10/10 would recommend!

Another podcast (and Instagram account) I love is Calm Parenting Podcast with Kirk Martin. His tips have helped me a lot in dealing with tricky behaviors!

Homeschool Better Together Podcast by Pam Barnhill is another great one! (You’ll see Pam mentioned in my book list above, too!)

The nice thing about podcasts is you can try them out with minimal effort, and see if you like the style! You can also just browse through episodes to find topics that pertain to your situation. I love listening to podcasts while I’m out for a walk (alone!) or doing chores around the house!

Cultivate Community in Homeschooling

The last way I think you can be the best homeschool mom you can be is to cultivate community in your area! If you attend a co-op, that’s an easy way to start. If you don’t attend a co-op, you could create or join a free Facebook group!

Here are some ideas to spark discussion, foster community and grow together, with other homeschool moms, dads or families in general:

• Start a shared Google Doc with favorite kid activities or play locations! This could be organized by season, suburb or city, or any way you want! One of the best parts of community is the ability to crowdsource. Maybe it’s the dead of winter and you’ve been dying to try that indoor playground two cities over, but aren’t sure if it’s worth the price. Ask another mom! Share a Google Doc with a group of 10-15 moms and see what activities you can accumulate. Sometimes you also just forget that things exist! When I made one of these Google Docs several years back, a friend jogged my memory about Home Depot’s free kid workshops each month, and we’ve been going ever since.
• Host a Mom’s Night, or Curriculum Chat at your house! Last year, at our co-op, my job was to coordinate Mom’s Nights for the first semester. One of the events I organized was a “Curriculum Chat” of sorts. I invited everyone to my house, and served simple snacks and drinks. I encouraged everyone to bring along concrete items that they wanted to share–their favorite curriculum, materials or resources that had been working well for their family. Sometimes it’s nice to physically examine a product you’ve been wondering about, before you purchase! It’s also nice to ask people you know their opinion on the product. Moms brought all sorts of interesting curriculum books, Montessori math manipulatives, tips and tricks to share with everyone! Every time I talk to other homeschool moms I learn something new, and this evening was no exception.
• Create a free survey on Google Forms, for a topic you want to crowdsource! I actually did this before I started homeschooling. I wanted to get as much feedback from people I actually knew, as I possibly could. Reading articles and books from strangers can only take you so far! I designed a five-question survey and sent it to friends and family who either 1) had been homeschooled themselves, as kids, 2) were currently homeschooling their own children, or 3) both! The results were informative and encouraging. Some of the best advice I’ve ever received.

I hope this post has been helpful! If you take anything away from reading this, remember: prioritize your health, and what brings you joy-even if it’s just one thing at a time! Parenting is beautiful, rewarding, and hard sometimes. No one can pour from an empty cup.

Cait